Trying To Find My Way Back...

SURPRISE!!!!

Guess who's back?! Sorta... I've abandoned this blog, and it used to be such a source of joy for me. Storytime:

I started this blog and making soap and stuff as a form of self-medication. I was at the lowest point in my life and needed a hobby, a diversion. And it worked! For five or so years, I immersed myself into soaping and blogging and even selling a few things. I thought at one point, I would turn this into a second career, but it soon downgraded to a glorified hobby, and then to sometime-hobby, and eventually, oh yeah, I make and sell soap...

As I started to feel better, this all became an afterthought. I kept my Etsy shop open and even sold a few things, but then I began closing it more than I did operating it...ugh. I haven't made soap since...March? It was real pretty too, and as we approach fall and holiday season, I'm starting to feel like I want to get back into the groove of things-slowly...

I'm revisiting all my favorite soap and bath & body blogs for motivation and inspiration. The soap making bug never really goes away. It was just dormant.

Hello Blog! It's Me, Patrice!



Because I want my image burned in your brain.........



Yeah, so I’ve been slacking really badly lately, and according to blog etiquette, you’re not supposed to apologize for not posting consistently or whatever, but you know what? Screw that. This is my blog, and if I want to explain why I haven’t been blogging on the regular, then I will…ya know? As I was saying, I’ve been slacking really badly lately-no blogging, no soap making, no EntreCard dropping, no tweeting, shut down my FB page…I am in such a FUNK! I have lost my motivation somewhat because I’m really torn about whether I want to continue to do this-make soap and stuff. I never thought in a million years I’d say those words, but now, I’m really starting to question it. I used to be so passionate about doing this, but now, not so much. The main reason is I’m not happy with the direction of The Soap Seduction. I want to change the name and the product line entirely. I want to go completely crunchy or at least as organic as possible. That would mean no more synthetic fragrance oils or the use of oxides as coloring. That would also mean discontinuing practically my entire product line and starting fresh-which would be a tremendous financial undertaking. So, I’m mulling over things-very carefully and seriously. I do have a following, and I don’t want to isolate those folks, but I’m also getting an increasing demand for more “natural” products. We know how badly that term is misused in the beauty industry so if I decide to push forward with this concept, I must do it right! So as I continue to toil and ponder, I’ll be a little non-existent. I hope you stick around. I’m still blog stalking even though I may not comment, but I’m here!

Happy New Year....Late

Happy 2012! I have been intentionally M-I-A as of late. I've been at a crossroads friends. I'm at the point in this venture where I'm like "Why am I doing this? Am I really happy?" And the answer is not really. I try not to get too personal on this blog because I want to keep it all about the soap, but I can't keep it all about the soap if I don't explain why there's no soap...


I am currently taking this wonderful webinar called How To Run Your Own Successful Bath and Body Business, and although I've been selling online for almost 4 years, I don't feel successful. One thing this course has been teaching me is I've been doing it all wrong-for 4 years! With that being said, I've got to take a (giant) step back and re-assess things. It's been a grueling 2 weeks, and I'm glad I'm doing this now while it's still early. So, with that being said, I'm focusing on the "business" side of things-getting my house in order, trying to determine if I want to go in a different direction.That includes paring down my product line and weeding out the junk all the while still cranking out some soap. I can't stop making soap. It's semi-crackish heehee...

So I leave you with a shot of the latest batch of my infamous Shitfaced. It's scented in Southern Comforts and yeah, it really smells like Southern Comforts, but it leaves a sweet little "after-taste" on your skin. The "rocks" are actually scented in Black Raspberry & Vanilla. It balances out the main scent nicely.

This Is Why I'm Not A Soap "Artisan"

Ugh...Sometimes I go out of my comfort zone and attempt to try something new. Sometimes it works. Often times, it doesn't. This is one of those often times...

I call it Dingleberry Delight. Why, you may ask? Because this soap literally showed its ass. See?

Okay, it really aint the soap's fault, but I like blaming inanimate objects for my mistakes. I will try again because I really had a vision for this soap. I won't go into detail because I'm saving that for a successful batch. I just wanted you all to share in my misery....

The Big 4-0!

Me...at various ages...sizes...degrees of happiness...

So, yeah, today is my birthday. It was 40 (I can't believe I'm saying that) years ago today that I made my entrance into this crazy, beautiful world. It's really surreal to be 40. I remember when I was a teenager, and I thought 40 was ridiculously old. But 40 is the new 20. Right? Age is a state of mind. Right? I honestly feel 25. I am the healthiest physically than I've been in 10 years. I've endure so many hardships in my life-growing up with drug-addicted parents; being evicted from home after home; not knowing if there would be dinner on the table...But I've also had some beautiful experiences-going to Africa; falling in love; learning to make soap!

So as I start this new chapter, my heart is filled with such joy! There were times that I never thought I would make it-mentally, spiritually, or emotionally. Now, I am so grateful for every day that I open my eyes that I could just shout it from the rooftops. I am learning the power of forgiveness and living in the present. I am learning to love myself once again! So yes, I am 40 years old today, because my 39 year old self could never write these words and mean them with the strength and conviction that my 40 year old self now possesses!

And now, I shall have some cake....

Argh! Ugh! and $#^@!

That's how I'm feeling right about now which explains why there have been no regular posts, no new products, and my all around lack of everything...

Maybe it's the heat (a straight month of 90+ humid days). Maybe it's the frustration I'm feeling in trying to decide what direction I want to take this venture. Or maybe I'm just in a mood...I'll be back.

Trying Not To Compare...

 (Image courtesy of navedz.wordpress.com)

I follow a lot of soap blogs. One because I love to read about everyone else's addiction, and two, I like to obsess admire all the unique creations I see. But as hard as I try not to compare what I do to others, I do! I know beauty and creativity is subjective, but I can't help but think that my stuff is not good enough sometimes. For instance, I'll look at a soap made by someone else-same scent and ingredients (almost) as mine-and I'm like "How the hell did they do that!?" They have these incredible swirls, chunks, curls, or spirals embedded in their soaps, and I get insanely jealous-seriously! It's like grade school all over again. 

But then, I look back at all my wonderful customers who have since become what I consider friends, and read the feedback and blog reviews, and I'm brought back to reality. I must be doing something right. Right?

Flashback; My One and Only Craft Show

When I first started crafting, I went by the name of scentsations by pmh-real original, I know! And I exclusively made and sold candles only. I am notoriously shy, and my sister had to force me to go through with this show. I was still grieving the loss of my fiance Spencer who had died less than two months before the show, and I just did not want to be bothered-with anything or anyone. Needless to say, I think I was one of the more successful booths at that fair because no one else had anything like my pie and fruit-shaped candles. Still though, I haven't done another show since...
 
Wow!!! Look how far I've come...

WTF Wednesday

I had to snap this pic of my baby looking at a passerby. I love how she stares at something or someone. I know she's thinking, "WTF....."

Vaycay Wrap Up

I'm back! I spent the last 5 days in good ole Harlem, USA, and let me tell you: Whatever preconceptions you have about Harlem, just throw them out the window! Harlem is now more integrated than the south-and it's filled with all kinds of mainstream establishments and ethnicities! As a matter of fact, I think I saw as many Europeans than black, lol. It was a bit of a culture shock-but a pleasant one. I have never visited a neighborhood where you can literally do all of your shopping in a 5 block radius: You've got Old Navy, Staples, H&M, Magic Johnson Theater, Starbucks, and the world famous Apollo Theater all within walking distance of my sister's home. Oh, and for those of you who know NADA about New York (like me), did you know that Harlem is actually a part of Manhattan? It's not an actual city or a burrough.
GTFOH!!

(This crepe was my sister, not mine-too dough-y for my liking.)

You know, while in New York, you must go out and eat! It doesn't matter if it's the neighborhood bodega or the chic little eatery in midtown. Going out to eat is an event (and a month of conscious eating well and exercising all shot to shit in less than a week!) I ordered this club sandwich for lunch, and when I tell you that it was orgasmic, I am not exaggerating! It was the most delicious club sandwich I've ever had, and it was served on a baguette with a side of mesclun (sp?) greens. O-M-Gee!!!!! It was sick. The bacon was so meaty and tender-not crispy, crumbly, and non-existent like some club sandwiches. Then for my last meal of my trip, we had to go to Sylvia's! It was....SICK! Sylvia's is old school soul food-greens that taste like meat, lol. Kick-ass potato salad. BBQ ribs so good, you'll slap yo mama.....Enough food for two meals-maybe three for you bird-like eaters...

 (Yes, I ate every damn morsel!)

My sister also booked us for these "free" makeovers at Dior in Macy's. Macy's is always a freaking madhouse-no matter what time of day or year that you go. They were doing some kind of garden or floral something, and just imagine all the regular shopper/tourists paired with these garden enthusiasts/tourists: PURE D. HELL! Anyway, after being spackled with over $100.00 worth of product and gunk (by a chick who knew nothing about what colors to use on black skin), I ended up buying $54 worth of crap. I cannot BELIEVE I paid $24 for a tube of mascara. Slap me now! I felt obligated ya know? That makeover wasn't so free after all...

(My sister Myia after her over-priced makeover.)

So that was basically my trip-eating, but you do a lot of walking. I'll end with a shot of this disgusting billboard I spotted on the block. How can you be a person of God and preach this kind of sentiment? What happened to separation of church and state? What happened to human kindness and decency? What happened to getting your facts straight before advertising this garbage?

Absolutely Disgusting!

Taking A Little Vaycay....

So I'm off to my annual trek to NYC-Harlem this time (Bill Clinton, holla!!)-to spend some time with the sis and her man (can you say 3rd wheel????) It's really not a pleasure trip although I'll be sneaking in some. I'll be blogging about this special journey on my Phat By 40 blog in the coming weeks. I wish I could just snap my fingers and be there. I hate traveling. I much prefer staycations!

Deep-Seeded

We’re finally getting blue skies and sunshine highs, and I am so ready for warm weather! I found these soaps on my curing rack, and they’ve probably been there for about a month now. I thought this would be a watermelon-y type of soap, hence the appearance, but now it smells more like cucumber water-very spa and zen-like. Speaking of spas, I’m going to Atlantic City this summer to celebrate the last year of my 30’s (Where has the time gone? It seems like I just celebrated my 30^th!). I’ll be drinkin’, gamblin’, and detoxifyin’ at one of the hotel spas. I can’t wait! This soap will carry me through til then. I couldn’t wait to try it, and this little thing really explodes with scent. With all this talk of cucumbers, I’m off to make some cucumber slices marinated in Italian dressing now…

A Beautiful Snow

 

I stepped out of my front door, and this was a sight to behold! I had to snap a pic before it began to melt. Can you believe this is the same scene on the same day? We're expecting up to TWO FEET of  snow this weekend. I cannot wait! I'm still a big kid when it comes to snow....

Bitch Post #11: My Chest Is Heavy Enough..

It's time to get some things off of it. Some of my Facebook Fans have already gotten an earful, but I thought I'd share with the general population:) In no particular order:

1. You can only truly call it Castile soap if you only use olive and no other oils and/or butters!
2. Soap makers who list a soap and only show the soap in its packaging. Where's the friggin soap?!
3. Sellers who tell you that they'll leave you positive feedback if and only if you leave them positive feedback first. WTF??
4. Entrecard droppers who don't drop back. It's common courtesy like saying "Hello" back to someone who says "Hello" to you.
   
5. People who contact me about wholesaling my stuff, we work out the terms, I send them the bill, and then I never hear from them again (It's happened to me more than once in the last 6 months!)
6. People who adopt, buy, or are given pets only to turn around and dump them after they realize that pets are like children-they need love, attention, medical care, etc. This really burns me up!
   
7. When someone stops following my blog. It hurts a little. It's like saying, "Ugh, I don't like you anymore..." Yes, I do have a sensitive side, LOL.
   

I'm done bitching for now. I have lots more to say, but I'll save it for another post...

New Year, New Me

(Image courtesy of Daisie Carmen)

Happy New Year! I cannot believe we are in a new decade, can you? I remember celebrating the new millennium as if it were yesterday (only cuz I was sick as a dog and high on cough syrup with codeine.) So much has happened in the last 10 years. Let's do a brief recap shall we?

• I've lost too many loved ones to even count, but I've made many new friends.
• I changed jobs 4 times-but I remained in the same industry.
  
• I've moved only twice-which is a world record for me (At one point I was moving every 1.5 years!)
  
• I've lost and gained the same twenty pound and then some (OMG, did you see Eric from the Biggest Loser last week? He gained practically ALL of the weight back!)
• I started a business!!!

I could go on and on and on, but I'll spare you. I am so happy that it's 2010. For the first time in a long time, I truly feel as if my life is starting over. I am embarking on yet another weight loss effort, but this time, I'm going to document it-in print! I've even started a new blog dedicated to just that. Check it out here and follow along! So in parting friends, I wish you all health, happiness, and much success in 2010! I'm going to go step on the scale now and laugh my ass off before I start this endeavor....

Don't Even Ask...

Cuz I don't know what it is yet....This is what I get for trying to be cute! I need to stick to what I do best-just make the soap and stop trying to get ultra-creative! I'm a no-frills kinda gal, but I like to get a little frisky sometimes, but the results of this soap is definitely one of those WTF moments.



I won't even go into detail, but I'm selling this bad boy! Why is it the ugliest soaps smell the best? This one is vanilla with rose, jasmine, tonka bean, and bergamot. I put those white dots in there on purpose. This soap looks like it has chicken pox or it needs the H1N1 vaccine. Anyway, I'll give it a cheeky name and list it on one of my venues. Speaking of venues, I think I have too many. I can't keep up. Two of them are free til I sell something, but I haven't sold anything, so I'm not overly concerned.

Where is my lye??? I need to make some more soap. I'm having withdrawal pains...

Busy Weekend!

O-M-G! I was featured in the Etsy Storque last week (thanks to Epically Epic Soap for recommending my soap!), and the power of the press is no joke! Within 2 hours, I sold completely out of this soap after it had been sitting in a plastic bin since I made it about a month and a half ago. Even the ugly bits that I had sold! Now, I've made more-a bigger batch because the inquiries are still flowing.




With that being said, I've also been ordering raw materials and supplies in preparation for the holidays. I'm so disorganized, it's ridiculous. I'm trying to do inventory, but I get so overwhelmed that I can't focus. My mind has a thousand things on it at once! My living room is a disaster, my garbage is overflowing, and I haven't been on Twitter in a week! But I'm determined to be prepared this season. Last year was such a disaster. I didn't plan properly, so my sales tanked. I will not make that mistake this year!

Well, I'm just rambling, so I think I'll shut up now...I've got soaps to make!

Taking Care Of Me

Okay, this is the first time I'm revealing this. I don't like getting too personal, but I may be MIA soon (not posting as frequently, etc.), and I want to give all my buds a heads up. I've been suffering from hypertension (or high blood pressure as us plain folk call it) for years, and it's getting worse. It's hereditary, but I've also neglected my health for years-call it denial, "I'm too young for this crap...", whatever, but the fact remains that it's gotten pretty serious as of late. My pressure is dangerously high, and I've got to chill and take care of myself. That means eating healthier, getting enough sleep, and working out consistently (all of which I admittedly have not been doing.) Old habits die hard-even ones that could kill you! So, I'm going to start changing my eating habits, getting enough rest, exercising, and stop stressing over EVERY LITTLE THING!

I'll still be around, but maybe not as frequently. I'll be the silent stalker until I feel well enough to resume my hectic pace. I'll use this time to regroup, recoup, and prepare for the holiday rush. You'll see some posts throughout the coming weeks that I've prepared in advance because I love my blog too much to let it just fall off. So, I'll see you around more consistently in about 3 weeks (maybe longer) feeling refreshed, renewed, and ready to conquer!

Happy Birthday To Me....

Yes, today is the anniversary of my birth! I was born on a Wednesday (time? don't know) thirty-eight years ago today. Where has the time gone? I remember celebrating the big 3-0 like it was last year. I can't believe I'm 38. It sounds so dang old (sorry if you're over 38, but it does!) I guess having much younger cousins who constantly remind me of this doesn't help (young sh*ts-just kidding.) Sometimes I have to pinch myself because I can't believe I'm an adult! I live on my own. I work. I own a car. I pay rent and bills. It's really surreal sometimes.

Famous people celebrating with me today:

• Malcolm Jamal Warner (Theo from The Cosby Show)
• Robert Redford (umm...not a big fan, but he's cool)
• Edward Norton (loved him in 25th Hour and American History X)
  

Anyway, I plan on doing NADA today. I'll have a little cake and ice cream with the fam later. I'm just so thankful to be on this earth another year-healthy in mind and body. Talk to ya'll soon!

I'm An Incurable Insomniac-HELP!!!

(Sleepless in NY and Sleepless in DC)

My sister and I both suffer from insomnia. So did our mother, and it's not getting any better! I literally cannot sleep without taking a sleeping pill, a Benadryl, or Tylenol PM. I've tried all kinds of relaxation therapies, but nothing seems to work! My mind is constantly on "go." I am writing this post at 4:20 am, and I'm wide awake!

Do you suffer from insomnia or other nuisance disorders? I'm going to call my sister now so we can both talk about how fat we are! Hey, maybe if we can get to sleep at a decent hour, we'd lose 5 pounds easily....